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When it comes to engagement rings there is so much talk these days about people more interested in material possessions than true meaning. This is something that I have heard all about, as well as the arguments from both sides of the fence.
The facts of the case are, that many women are asking, demanding, or creating the impression, that they want a massive wad of cash dedicated to them, to wear on their finger, and men are borrowing money that they cannot afford, to get the love of their life to marry them. |
Now if this is true and the women demand it, then surely there is a compelling argument towards engagement rings being a necessity that we cannot afford!
My friend Stewart was telling me the other day that he wants to marry his girlfriend Jennifer and I thought that this was a great idea. I was getting really excited about those two young ones tying the knot.
I explained to Stewart that he needs to start to think about buying her a ring, to which he replied Thats the thing Johnny, I love Jennifer and surely you agree there is no doubt about that? But I am going to have to buy her a ring and that is going to cost well over $500 and that is something that I cannot afford at the moment, and not to mention I will also have to spend so much on the wedding itself that I am now very worried that I will never, ever be able to marry her at all.
What do you think Jennifer would do if I never bought her a ring, she would feel that I was not able to care for her, and she would feel that I was providing a sign of things that are to come. I simply cannot propose without a ring, I will need to wait until I can afford it.
Stewart certainly felt under pressure because of the financial issue surrounding the ring and this is understandable. Surely you would feel the same in Stewarts shoes? But the fact of the matter is that I feel Stewart should not have to wait and save up $500 before he can ask his girlfriend to marry him, I feel that social convention should be altered. I feel that a ring needs to move away from being a priority and become something that is seen as an old-fashioned tradition.
I told Stewart that he should speak with Jennifer and see if they can come to some sort of agreement. I told Stewart that he should tell Jennifer that he will propose to her once we can get his hands on the ring, and that will maybe make her think that the ring is not important and she wants to get married straight away. Surely if Jennifer truly loves Stewart then this is the approach that she will take? If not then Stewart does not have too much to worry about!
I am sure that he could save back $10 a week then in a years time he will have $520 which will allow for inflation. Hopefully in the future we live in a world that marriage does not discriminate against the poor, but until then it looks like we are going to have to save!